Earthbound Zero/Beginnings Review

A game with absolutely ZERO direction! Ha haa!!

After the success of Dragon Warrior in Japan (Dragon Quest over there, and even outside of Japan now), multiple Japanese game companies tried to ride the Dragon Warrior success train to fame and fortune, Shigesato Itoi being one of the many who was inspired by Dragon Warrior, and wanted to make a similar game with the main difference being that it was set in contemporary times, more specifically, in 1980's U.S.

The plot begins with Ninten (seriously, that's the protagonist's name, could Nintendo be any more narcissistic?) trying to leave his room, only to be attacked by a lamp, which he easily beats. He goes to one of his sisters' rooms and finds a doll attacking her, and beats it up, as well. Searching the doll, Ninten finds a music box that plays part of a melody and he remembers it. Going downstairs, he finds that his mother is also in shock about what's happening, and then the phone rings, the call being from Ninten's father, who tells him that his Great-Grandfather studied psychic powers and that Ninten should go on a journey to see what else he can discover.

Of course they couldn't just give
you a break!

Of course, no RPG is that easy, because you're going to have to grind your nuts off if you want to get anywhere. Now, looking at the screenshot at the left, you'll notice that this game's battle system bears a striking resemblance to Dragon Warrior 3's battle system. While traveling through the overworld and the dungeons scattered throughout, you'll get attacked randomly by enemies, not necessarily by monsters, but rather by other people and animals who are going crazy. I won't mention exactly what's causing them to go crazy just yet, but remember this for later. During battle, you see the enemies in front of you, and you have a menu that lists what actions you're allowed to take during battle. If you manage to beat the enemies, and yes, the enemies in this game are a bigger threat than most of the ones in even Dragon Warrior II. Also, unlike in Dragon Warrior II, where only Malroth has a unique battle theme, most enemies in this game share a theme with certain other ones. For example, the hippie in that screenshot has a unique theme shared with only one other enemy in the game, I think. One that doesn't show up for quite a while.

Anyway, back to the story. Ninten travels to Podunk, and he then goes off to a graveyard to rescue a girl. I don't know how the girl was kidnapped by zombies, I just know that she was. Anyway, Ninten rescues her and they travel back to the mayor of Podunk. Ninten also buys a canary at the local department store in Podunk, for... reasons? Anyway, going north, Ninten reaches the zoo that the mayor told him about that was having problems and fixes it and learns a tune from the singing monkey caged up there, and he also gives the canary chick to a canary named Laura who also teaches Ninten another part of the tune. Basically, the story of the game boils down to travelling the world of Earthbound Beginnings and learning the tunes to an eight-note long melody. Basically, the exact same plot of every other JRPG from Dragon Warrior II onwards during this period of time.

Couldn't have put it better myself!
Thanks for writing my script for
me, Nintendo!

Speaking of an eight-note long melody, this game has some pretty rockin' music for an NES game! Seriously, just listening to this music is one of the main reasons to play through the game to see what other songs you get to listen to as you play! Also, just like Dragon Warrior II and Dragon Warrior IV, Earthbound doesn't have just one overworld theme, it has two, based on how many party members you have in your party at the time. At the start, with only Ninten in the party, it's a basic melody called Polyana (I Believe In You) that ensures that you feel that you're a child going out into the world all on your lonesome, with some great destiny for you at the end of the road that you travel on, and when you have two or more party members in the group, then the overworld theme switches to Bein' Friends, which is a much more powerful sounding melody, reminding you that now, at least, you have at least one person there who will watch and have your back no matter what. One of the tunes in the game actually sounds like the Victory Road theme from Pokemon Yellow/Red/Blue!

You know, graphics-wise this is actually one of the better-looking NES games, having walls that look like brick walls (Look at the screenshot above for proof of that) or having floors so shiny that it looks like the walls are actually reflecting off of them.

I do have to point out at least one thing about Earthbound Zero/Beginnings that I just can't stand, and that is the game's ridiculously high level of difficulty, and it absolutely does not let up, at any point in the game. Earthbound Beginnings starts off hard, and it stays hard throughout the entire game. Now, I used a ROM Hack that made Earthbound Beginnings a lot more forgiving, but even then it was still hard.

I honestly don't think I'd be able to recommend this game to anyone who lacks patience, doesn't have an affinity for old NES RPGs, or just hates grinding, because you're going to need about all three of them just to make it through Earthbound Beginnings. It's honestly a shame because it starts off so well, but it then immediately takes a nose-dive in terms of quality not long afterwards. Even worse, the game was only playtested to about halfway through the game, meaning that just like Dragon Warrior II, they didn't bother playtesting the entire game, only whereas in Dragon Warrior II it was the last two dungeons, in Earthbound Beginnings, HALF OF THE GAME WASN'T PLAYTESTED!!! Argh!!

An alien!

It hurts me badly to say this, but I can only honestly give Earthbound Beginnings a 5/10, and that's me being generous, by the way. I'd give it lower, but most Nintendo fans can't bear the thought of Nintendo or its products getting criticized, but then again the game's score could've been higher. Then again, the other half of the game could've also been playtested!

I rate this game a 5/10. Not so bad, but not so good, either.

Dragon Warrior IV Review

A castle floating in the sky on the clouds!

Dragon Warrior IV, released in Japan as Dragon Quest IV, is a bit of an odd duck in the series of Dragon Warrior games that were released back then, and even still considered a bit of an odd-duck in the series today, as instead of just having one large overarching story, the player must play through five chapters of the game (four that set the story for Chapter 5 up, and the fifth chapter sees how all of the actions of the previous chapters effect this chapter) but we'll get to all of that later.

The soldier gives you a hint about the King and
on how to acquire better equipment, at least
from town shops.

Gameplay-wise, Dragon Warrior IV plays out the exact same way as the previous three Dragon Warrior games; you talk to people to get clues on where to go next, you go outside and grind against monsters to level up and to get gold pieces to buy better weapons and armor so that you can be outside grinding monsters even longer. It feels a lot closer to Dragon Warrior III in this regard than Dragon Warrior I and Dragon Warrior II, as it doesn't take anywhere near as long to level up as it did in the first two games, and about the same amount of time grinding as it took back in Dragon Warrior III. However, unlike in Dragon Warrior III, this time there is no character creation option. All the characters that join you already have predetermined names, classes, stats and stat growths. Now, for some, this is a welcome change indeed. For others, like myself, it dampens the experience quite a bit. Now, make no mistake, I have absolutely nothing against playable characters who are tied into a video game's story, not even in RPGs, but it's something that I heavily prefer, because in games like Baldur's Gate, you have to balance your actions with the possible options at your disposal carefully. Like, very carefully, because your companions have minds of their own and they will leave your party if you perform actions that they don't like, which is one reason why I always create my own characters in Baldur's Gate I and Baldur's Gate II. Thankfully, in Dragon Warrior IV, you don't have to worry about nonsense like that.

People have different things to say at nighttime.

The day-night system from Dragon Warrior III also returns, and just like back there, it plays a role in the game's story somewhat, only to a slightly larger degree. Some people will only be out at day, and others will only come out at night. Some people will have different things to say at night, while others will tell you the exact same things they said during the day, or they might even be asleep! While this attention to detail was impressive back in the day, it's nowhere near impressive as it is in some games, such as the Elder Scrolls series or the Fallout series, for an NES game this was pretty darned impressive! Of course, you also have to remember that, back then, game developers had a lot less money and space on whatever medium games were used to play on. The NES, for example, had very little space on it's cartridges and so some sacrifices had to be made here and there.

Just like in Dragon Warrior III, you don't get a
message saying that "wit and courage have
served you well" while leveling up.

Grinding is still in Dragon Warrior IV, just as it was in Dragon Warriors I, II, and III, but like I said earlier and in my Dragon Warrior III review, the grinding is more bearable this time. The complaints about the grinding from Dragon Warrior II seem to have stuck with Enix regarding the grinding in the Dragon Warrior games, and although it still gets bad later on in each and every game, it's still not at a level nearly as bad as Dragon Warrior I and II were. Another thing that they changed back in Dragon Warrior III was removing the annoying "wit and courage have served you well, for So-and-so has been promoted to the next level!" message. One of the complaints from Dragon Warrior II that Enix didn't get, however, was the lack of a battle background. Dragon Warrior I had a battle background of sorts, yes, but that game wasn't nearly as large as the other Dragon Warrior games that came out on the NES, now were they? Again, you have to remember that back then, game developers didn't have a lot of space on cartridges to put in every single thing they wanted, and who knows how much space on an NES cartridge that would've taken up. Heck, even in Earthbound there were no battle backgrounds, but then again, we Westerners never got Earthbound 1, we got Earthbound 2 (Mother 1 and Mother 2 in Japan) but I digress. Back then, you took what you could get or you found a different hobby.

Story time! For some people, this will be their favorite part of the review, and for others like myself, not so much. As you can see, Dragon Warrior IV was the first, and so far only, Dragon Warrior game to use chapters like this to break up the story, and just like with a good book, you can't just start in the middle or at the end, oh no, you started with Chapter 1: The Royal Soldiers every time you started a new game, and you would play through that one, and then Chapter 2 and Chapter 3 after that, all the way up until you got to Chapter 5. However, like I said at the start of the review, each chapter in the game leads up to the events in Chapter 5, explaining to the player what exactly is going on and why you should care about the characters, and speaking of the characters, unlike in Dragon Warrior III, where they were, ahem, to put it in the words of some imbeciles out there who like to dismiss player created party members, brain-dead puppets, they each have their own strengths, weaknesses, and backstories. For example, Ragnar is a Soldier, and like the Soldier class from Dragon Warrior III, he has amazing HP, Strength, Vitality, Defense, and can equip most weapons and armor in the game. However, all that time that Ragnar spent learning how to fight with all manner of weapons and armor has left him with very little time to study magic, so he won't learn any spells to cast, nor will he ever gain MP. He also has really sorry Agility. Alena is a Princess, which is basically the Fighter class from Dragon Warrior III, and as such, she doesn't rely on equipment or spells like the other characters in the game, instead preferring to rely on raw stats alone. Seriously, she'll easily max out her Strength and Agility, and her Vitality is nothing to sneeze at, either. She gains a ton of Luck as well, but her Intelligence leaves a bit to be desired, although she doesn't need it, as like Ragnar, she never bothered learning how to cast spells, although Brey tried to teach her, according to the iOS and Android English translations. Also, Alena has an awful selection for equipment. Mara can't fight worth a darn, but dang can she dish out some damage with her spells! However, each character has their strengths and weaknesses that compliment your other characters. For example, Cristo learns the Revive spell, but in combat during Chapter 5, his AI is... untrustworthy, to say the least. Remember this, as I'll come back to it later. However, Nara is also a healer, and although she doesn't learn all of the healing spells that Cristo does, her AI is more reliable.

Unlike the previous Dragon Warrior games,
the AI now controls the party members
during Chapter 5.

Screw it, we may as well get this out of the way now. You see, for whatever reason, Enix decided that, during Chapter 5 of the game, the AI, and the AI alone, should be the ones controlling the characters who you didn't get to name and create back at the start of the game. Now, to be fair, the AI can do some things that are literally impossible for a human player to do, such as read what the enemy is going to do and react accordingly. The best a player character can do is merely guess, and that's a lot harder than it sounds early on because there isn't an awful lot you can do if, say, your primary healer gets killed. Now, you can prevent that, but only if one of your other characters has higher Agility than the enemy or your other party members, but that character has to at least know the Heal spell or have some Medical Herbs on hand to be able to do anything about it. Still, it was a fairly big gamble on Enix's part and they learned from their mistake from this game's AI to never make that mistake again. That's what mistakes do, isn't it?

You were actively ignoring your subjects
problems!?

Anyway, back to story time. As I said before, this game's story is divided into chapters, and each one sets up how things are going to play out in the final chapter of the game, Chapter 5. Chapter 1 sees the player jump into the shoes of the royal soldier Ragnar (Ryan in the Japanese version) and how the King has had mothers from Izmit village coming to him in tears that morning about their children suddenly vanishing. As the King's most trusted soldier, it's up to Ragnar to find out why the children are just disappearing the way they are. You go to Izmit Village yourself and you hear from someone that the tower located in the middle of the lake seems suspicious and how you should investigate it, but it's impossible to enter because it's in the middle of a lake and there's no bridge leading to it. You reunite a woman with her husband and he tells you about a hidden well that the children play around at, and so you go there to investigate further. There you find some Flying Shoes and a Healslime named Healie who wants to become a human, so Ragnar lets him tag along. Putting on the Flying Shoes has Ragnar fly into the Lake Tower where he sees a child being taken off by a monster. Working his way down to the bottom of the tower, Ragnar sees a soldier dying on the floor who tells them the monsters' plan. He says that the Ruler of Evil is about to reawaken somewhere in the world and that the hero who is fated to destroy him is growing up at this time. Basically, the monsters plan is to kill the hero while he or she is still growing and weak. Just before the soldier passes away, he tells Ragnar that he must protect all the children in the world. Going downstairs, Ragnar meets the monsters who have been kidnapping the children, and he and Healie beat them senseless. Ragnar and Healie take the children home and return to Burland castle to tell the King about his plan to protect the Hero. The King allows this, and gives Ragnar some experience points as a parting gift.

In Chapter 2, you control Alena, the princess
of Santeem Castle.

After that, you move straight into Chapter 2, only this time, you're not playing as Ragnar anymore, and you're not overseeing his journey from Burland to wherever he ends up next, no, you're playing as the Princess of Santeem, Alena, who wants to travel the world to prove her strength. Her father, the King of Santeem, and her tutor, Brey, both feel that she's too much of a tomboy and should learn to behave like a proper princess should, but she is absolutely determined to make her mark on the world through a show of strength. Talking with Brey and Cristo, she goes back to her room to find the wall she kicked down the last time boarded up with flimsy boards, and kicks it down again, and heads out into the world with Cristo and Brey hot on her heels. So basically, instead of controlling just one character in this chapter, you're controlling three, and each one of them has their own strengths and weaknesses, which gets you ready for the later chapters of the game, so use this time wisely.

Puns, and not for the first time, either.

The only direction that the player can have Alena and her companions go is north, and arriving at the village of Tempe, they learn that a monster is demanding sacrifices of women at the village alter, just like how the Orochi demanded female sacrifices at Jipang in Dragon Warrior III. Anyway, Alena decides that this would be the best way to test her strength in battle and decides to help. She offers to become the monster's next sacrifice, and defeats the monster like she claimed she would. Afterwards, Alena travels to another village, only to find that they're apparently already there, only they're not there, it's a group of imposters who got carried away with their act. Well, it's the obvious hostage situation, and since Alena is the hero of the chapter, that means it's up to her to do something about this. Going south, Alena comes upon a cave that has an item that apparently affects evolution called the Golden Amulet. Getting this treasure, she takes it back to the village at nighttime and exchanges it for the "princess'" life. The princess reveals that she's actually a travelling actor named May, and as a reward for saving her life and teaching her a valuable life lesson in the process, May gives Alena the Thief's Key. Going further south, Alena reaches a bizarre where she learns that the King of Santeem is in danger! He's lost his voice, and to fix it, you have to talk to a bunch of people, only to find out that someone at the bizarre knows where the cure to damaged throats is, and that's at a tower to the west of the Bizaar. Getting to the top of the tower and getting the cure, you give it to the King of Santeem who says that you can now go wherever you want to in the world, he'll try to stop you no longer, and you go off and win a tournament in Endor. You learn that Necrosaro was the only one prior to winning five rounds of combat in a row, but since he's nowhere to be found, Alena is declared the winner of the tournament by forfeit. However, the glory was not to last, as a Santeem soldier comes up to you as you leave the castle and tells you to return home, but at the castle... no one is home? Alena sets off to solve this riddle and several others as well. Thus ends Chapter 2.

Chapter 3: Taloon the Arms Merchant

Chapter 3 rolls around and it's by far the most unique chapter in the entire game. You see, in this chapter, you don't spend time fighting to just level up and get money, no, you have to save up your money to purchase your own weapon and armor shop. You start off in Lakanaba, to the north of Endor, where Taloon works for another weapon shop owner, and he makes money based on how hard he's worked for the day. After Taloon has saved up enough money to purchase some weapons and armor of his own, he can then go out into the world and start adventuring. Talking to some of his buddies over at the inn, he learns that there's an Iron Safe in the cave north of Lakanaba, and it prevents its owner from losing money if killed. This is a necessity for Taloon's chapter, as he is no warrior at all, he's a merchant and his starting stats and stat growths prove this. As such, being able to venture without worry is a must for chapter 3. Anyway, during this chapter you have to solve Indiana Jones-styled puzzles and sell treasures to get enough money to move on. This chapter is the worst in the NES version, but in the remakes it's a lot better.

The start of Chapter 4

Then Chapter 4 starts, and it's back to the usual Dragon Warrior IV stuff. Go outside of town, grind a lot to build up levels and get some gold pieces, then go back into town to buy some new gear to be out killing things even longer. 

I mentioned this earlier in the review, but it needs to be stressed for those who are sitting on the fence about whether or not to buy this game. Whenver you complete one chapter in the game and move onto the next one, you lose the character you had, along with all of their money and items, you get two new characters who start off in a completely different location with basic equipment for their class, and you have to build them up all over again. They also lose all of their money, too. 

Anyway, back to the story of Chapter 4. Mara and Nara are twin sisters whose father was killed by his apprentice, and now they want revenge. Basic, but it gets you going. They go back to their home town and learn that another of their father's apprentices is hiding in the old cave out to the west. Going there, they find the Sphere of Silence and Orin, not to mention the Lamp of Darkness. Going to the Castle of Keeleon, they learn that Balzack is somewhere inside, but nobody knows where. They also learn that the Chancellor is easily startled, and going to Aktemto Mine, they find the Gunpowder Jar. Going back to Keeleon, they detonate the Gunpowder Jar, and just like the person at the castle said, it startled the Chancellor, who basically leads the party to Balzack. They beat Balzack easily enough with the Sphere of Silence, but then Keeleon himself appears and beats them. Waking up in a jail cell, an old man tells them that he's too weak to leave the country and gives them his Boarding Pass to go to Endor. So the girls leave the country of their birth and end up in Endor.

Chapter 5, the final chapter of
Dragon Warrior IV.

Thus begins Chapter 5, the final chapter of Dragon Warrior IV, and easily the longest chapter in the entire game. You finally get to play as Solo (the male protagonist) or Sofia (the female protagonist) depending on the gender you chose for the main character back when you named him or her, and unlike in Dragon Warrior III where, even if you chose to play as a female Hero, she would still be referred to as a male, here the female Hero is actually referred to with feminine pronouns and she has a unique sprite! Anyway, you start the game off by having to take your father his lunch, and he says that because you're seventeen now, you're almost an adult. You then return home for lunch, but monsters have found the village and seek to kill you, for you are their greatest threat. Killing everyone in the village, your best friend takes your place, fooling the monsters into thinking that they've killed the legendary hero. Leaving the secret room in the cellar, you find that your village has been destroyed and everyone else killed. You leave the village and go south to a woodsman's hut, and he tells you to go to the castle in the south. Deciding that no one here can help you, you go to Endor in the west, through the tunnel that Taloon created back in Chapter 3. Here you find Nara and Mara and they join you. Going back eastward past the castle, you find a man who has lost his faith in humanity, so you bring him the Symbol of Faith from a nearby dungeon. Regaining his faith in humanity, he gives you his wagon and travels along with you for a while. You go south through the desert and find a port town where a ship is being built, but it's crew is too scared to sail with the evil light shining from a nearby lighthouse. You fix the lighthouse's problem and you now have a ship, meaning that you can sail anywhere in the world, but the problem is is that monsters that you fight out at sea are no pushovers and so you should do as you're told for now. 

Two of the characters you controlled back in
Chapter 2. Noticing a pattern here?

In the town of Mintos, you meet an old guy who gives you a treasure map that leads to--what else?-- great treasure. You also go to the inn and learn that one of the characters from Chapter 2 is sick and in need of medicine, so you go to the town off to the east and you learn that the medicine is kept in an ice cavern. You get it and go back to town, give it to the king who manages to make the root needed grow, and you go back to Mintos and give it to Cristo. The Chapter 2 party then rejoins your group and you continue on your merry little way, but not before a man who overheard your conversation tells you that a man named Ragnar was staying at that very inn not that long ago, and that he said he was headed west to visit the House of Prophecy. Going West, you land straight in Keeleon, but you see a human who happens to be Healie, who says that Ragnar snuck into the castle but was captured. Healie says that the party will need the Magic Key to enter and that it's somewhere in a cave to the south. Basically, the spot where you found the Lamp of Darkness in Chapter 4. You get the Magic Key, you come back to Keeleon, and you fight him again, only this time you actually manage to beat him. Ragnar then joins your group, and you see Healie head off into the world. You also learn that Balzack went north, to Santeem. I won't spoil the story any further from here, I'll let you play it for yourself.

A scarecrow!

The music was composed yet again by a literal war-crimes-denier, Koichi Sugiyama. Yuji Horii wrote the scenario for the game and Akira Toriyama designed the monsters and the characters. Basically, the same setup from the previous three Dragon Warrior games. 

Overall, I can easily recommend Dragon Warrior IV to players, but just like the previous three Dragon Warrior games, not the NES version. Thankfully, we got a few ports of the game, and I would go with the Nintendo DS version. Unfortunately, they cut the party chat system, meaning that non-Japanese fans didn't get a lot of character development and potential story development, but the NES version didn't have that, either, but it would still have been nice to have that in the English version. Thankfully, due to the humongous outrage from non-Japanese fans, Square Enix seems to have learned their lesson on removing party chat from the games English releases, so we'll just have to wait and see.

Respect my authoritah and my copyrah!

My rating for this game is 7/10. Worth it!

This review, including all text and screenshots are © 2019 Jestan Diams. Please don't repost this anywhere else on the internet or print it in a gaming magazine without my express written consent.

Dragon Warrior III Review

I know what you're all thinking: "after the disasterpiece that was Dragon Warrior II, how in God's name did they get the thought that the world needed more of that game?"

Well, good news, everyone! Dragon Warrior III is much better than Dragon Warrior and Dragon Warrior II! Good thing, too, or else Dragon Warrior would've been killed off outside of Japan rather quickly!

Ortega's ill-fated battle at the start.

Just like in Dragon Warrior II, Dragon Warrior III has a cutscene that shows Ortega, the father of the Hero of Dragon Warrior III, battling a dragon. Unlike Dragon Warrior II, though, this one only plays if you sit at the title screen long enough. Okay, that's not a bad way to start the game, you've got my attention. Anyway, Ortega manages to chop off one of the baddie's wings, but the baddie apparently has the 'taking you with me' trope on its mind, as it drags Ortega into the volcano with it, seemingly killing him. Remember this for later, because Ortega is a fella we'll be hearing an awful lot about.

Now the gals get to be the main character!

Anyway, after that, we have to do what we did in the first two Dragon Warrior games, but *gasp*! Not only do we choose the name of our character and the message speed, we even get to choose their gender!

A dangerous sixteenth birthday.

Anyway, after Ortega fell into the volcano, his child apparently has petitioned that he or she be allowed to finish the quest that Ortega started by going on their own quest. Your mother wakes you up on your sixteenth birthday as proven by the screenshot to the left and takes you to the castle to get the King's permission to go on this quest. Why you need the King's permission to go on a quest like this is beyond me, personally, but whatever. He says "Thy enemy shall be the Archfiend Baramos!" and he gives you 50 gold pieces to properly equip your party to start them off. Now, in the NES version, or rather, the USA version, he only gives you 50 gold pieces, because the characters that you hire and create already come equipped with weapons and armor. In the Japanese version, as well as all international ports, they only come equipped with clothes, so the King instead gives you not just 50 gold pieces, but three weapons and three different armors. Personally, I prefer the USA NES version's way of doing it more, but whatever.

Anyway, you go over to the west side of town to Luisa's Eatery (Ruida's Tavern in the Japanese version, and Patty's Party Planing Place in all modern translations of the game) to recruit some characters, and you'll notice that you've already got three characters pre-generated for you. But what if you don't like their names or starting stats or whatever? Not to worry! You can go upstairs and talk to the guy behind the counter who will let you create your own characters for absolutely nothing! You can choose their name, class, and gender just like you could for the hero. Speaking of gender, there are two things you must know: 1.) The hero in the NES version, even if you chose to be female, will still be referred to in masculine terms, and 2.) There are a few items that only female characters can equip, but most of them don't make a difference, not to mention there are stronger items available for both genders, thank God! I can't stand the trope of 'Game-Favored Gender!'

The slimes are coming!
The slimes are coming!

Anyway, after you've selected your party members, it's out into the world of the game for, what else, random battles. Just like in Final Fantasy I, in Dragon Warrior III (not to mention Dragon Warrior II) you have to plan out your attacks. Remember how I said in Final Fantasy I, if you have one of your party members attacking one monster and that hit kills it and if another character was targeting that monster, that attack would hit nothing and was considered ineffective? Well, Dragon Warrior III has that, too! Only here, it's much worse. See, when you choose to attack a group of monsters, you aren't allowed to choose which specific monster in that group that the selected character attacks, meaning that you don't have that much control over your characters. At least, in Final Fantasy I you could choose which monster you could attack, although that still doesn't justify the ineffective attacks, but whatever. Anyway, grinding is what you're going to be doing most of the time in any single Dragon Warrior game, and Dragon Warrior III is no different. To me, though, being able to go adventuring throughout a Dragon Warrior game with my friends and family members alongside me makes the grinding so much better! Unfortunately, in the Dragon Warrior franchise, the character creation mechanic wouldn't be seen again until Dragon Warrior IX. (Dragon Quest IX even outside Japan, I know, but again I prefer Dragon Warrior.)

Adventuring with a friend from childhood,
my brother, and a stranger.

Hey, you remember how large the world in Dragon Warrior II was, right? Well, the world of Dragon Warrior III is bigger than that, I think! As you can see in the picture, there's an island with a tower on it, but no clear way to get to it. Well, there are actually two ways to get it! It will be four, but the problem is that you have to get the object from the tower to use the third way. The fourth way is by ship, and it comes along so long after you've finished in that particular tower that you shouldn't bother. Okay, so two ways. You're told in Aliahan, the starting city of the game, that you can get to the tower by going to the Cave on the Promontory, and in the village of Reeve, that there's a spot of forest you can enter south from there to get into the tower. Anyway, in that tower, which is named the Tower of Najima, by the way, is the Thief's Key, and as the chancellor of Aliahan told you, "First, find a key. Everything begins with that." And so it does! Unless you're using a game genie or you just grind like there's no tomorrow, you'll have to get that key to get the next item you need to continue the game, the Ball of Light (Wrecking Ball in the more modern translations) so that you can break down a wall that impedes your progress.

It's around this point that enemies can
start poisoning you! Be careful!

Anyway, you make it through the dungeon that the Ball of Light opens up for you, and you make it through that dungeon to the Kingdom of Romaly, which has a suspiciously-similar-sounding name to Rome, don't you think? Ah, whatever, probably just my imagination. (sarcasm warning) Anyway, here you discover that the Golden Crown was stolen by some jerk named Kandar (Robin 'Ood in the modern translations) and the King expects you to get it back for him. Problem is, Kandar is no pushover, in fact, he's the first boss of the game! So, what you'll want to do is go north to Kanave to get some better weapons and armor, not to mention grind a few levels out, and then help Noaniels with their problem, and then you can go to the Tower of Shampane (I honestly forget what it's called in the modern translations) to fight Kandar, and he doesn't come alone, oh no, he has three henchman with him, meaning you have quite a fight on your hands, especially if you didn't bother grinding up enough levels and buying better equipment for your characters!

Come on, you didn't think it would be
that easy, did you?

Anyway, after you beat Kandar, he begs for mercy and gives you the Golden Crown, which upon taking back to Romaly, the King makes you take over the Kingdom (you can refuse in all the remakes of the game) to which you have to find him gambling in the arena and tell him that, while the kings and queens of the world have it good, you'd really much rather be back out adventuring with your friends. He says that he won't make you continue doing something you dislike, and takes back his throne. He moans for a little bit, and then you go east, to the Arab-sounding town of Assaram. Here, the shops have equipment that's probably a little bit better than what you'd normally get at around this area, but the problem is is that all of the prices are jacked way up there! I honestly just skipped it altogether, except there are two weapon and armor shops here, one that's open during the day, and the other that's open at night. The nightime one sells weapons, I think, and the daytime one sells armor. Anyway, here you find out that the Magic Key is located somewhere in Isis and that you should go there. Since you need the Magic Key to get to Portoga, that sounds like as good a place as any to go adventuring.

First to the east, then to the west....

Anyway, in the Kingdom of Isis, you learn that the Magic Key is actually located in the Pyramid, and that it, just like in everything else, is basically a royal tombstone that has a load of treasures inside, but it also has a lot of monsters, including mummies and spirits, and that's before we get to the maze on the second floor and the traps! Anyway, as you can see from the caption for the screenshot to the right, or if you talked with the children in the Isis Castle Throne Room, they give you a hint about how to proceed on the third floor. Pressing two buttons will open a corridor that leads to an Alter of some sort, which has a stat-boosting seed and the Magic Key! We're through in here, but we have to walk back down to at least the second floor, as this dungeon is the first of... two, if I remember correctly, where magic just absolutely refuses to work. Anyway, with the Magic Key, you head off to Portoga and the King there says he'll give you a ship if you'll bring him back some Black Pepper. He says that Black Pepper is plentiful in the far east and gives you a scroll to give to Norud the Dwarf. The best way to get to Norud is to cast Return or use a Wing of Wyvern and go back to Assaram and then head into the cave.

Norud can show us the way!

After Norud opens the passage that leads to the east, you go into the town of Baharata where you learn that an old man's granddaughter has been kidnapped. The old man wants your party to do it, but Galin, the love of the old man's granddaughter, says that he can't ask something so important of strangers and runs off to do it himself. Naturally, that won't end well, so we chase after him, going to a cave slightly northwest of Baharata. In that cave, who else could've done something this despicable except for Kandar! Your party tells Garin and whatever-his-love's-name-is to amscray while you fight Kandar, who has seriously toughened up since the last time you fought each other (of course, you have, too, hopefully) he says that this time he really has learned the error of his ways, so of course you have to let him go again. Only this time he means it because you never see him again, at least for a while. Going back to Baharata, Garin has returned to work as the Black Pepper guy, and since you saved him and his lover, he gives you the Black Pepper for free, along with a little bit of advice: to the north, in the mountains, is the Shrine of Dhama (Alltrades Abbey in the modern translations) and you then take the pepper back to the King of Portoga and, keeping good on his end of the bargain, gives you a ship, meaning that you can now travel all over the world of Dragon Warrior III! The game also gets pretty non-linear from here, and I don't want to spoil anymore of the story, so let's move onto other things now.

Class changing!?

The gameplay of Dragon Warrior III is, as you've no doubt noticed or started to pick up by now, is very similar to Dragon Warrior II, apart from being able to create your own characters as party members, not only that, but you get to change their classes, as well! Needless to say, though, you can't change the Hero's class, but whatever. Also, in order for a character to become a Sage, they must possess either the Book of Satori, or they must be a Goof-Off (Gadabout in the modern translations. I swear to God I hate British English with a passion, I wish they'd take it out of Dragon Quest's modern translations) and Sages are well worth the effort it takes to get them. They have an equipment list that is slightly better than that of the Pilgrim's, and they can learn both spell lists, Pilgrim and Wizard! Also, Sages don't seem to favor any single stat save intelligence, but their other stat growths are fantastic, as well! Now you know why you aren't allowed to create them at Luisa's Eatery!

The music for Dragon Warrior III was once again composed by Koichii Sugiyama, a literal war-crimes denier who pretends that the bad stuff that the Japanese did in China never happened, but whatever. The character designs were done yet again by Akira Toriyama (and yes, that is Dragon Ball's Akira Toriyama, in case you were wondering), and the game's scenario was written by series creator Yuji Horii. These three would work on this franchise as the roles they are now for years to come, as well, and they each do their jobs fantastically!

I honestly see why this game is so beloved in Japan, and it's unfortunate that it didn't get the love and respect it deserves even today. I hope that my review can help change the Western World's views on Dragon Warrior, because this one, although it has it's problems, still holds a special place in my heart, and it's why I will always hang onto my NES cartridge version of Dragon Warrior III for the rest of my life.

My final score for this game: 8/10. Definitely worth your time!

Dragon Warrior II Review

Dragon Warrior II or, according to the title screen you can see in the screenshot says, Dragon Warrior Part 2, is the next game in the Dragon Warrior series of games. After the success of the first Dragon Warrior game, a sequel was obviously neccessary, and it shows because the first game got Akira Toriyama into trouble with his wife, due to not getting any work done, but I digress.

Dragon Warrior II is said to be the game that introduced a lot of concepts to the JRPG genre, but honestly, I have to disagree. Everything Dragon Warrior II did was done either by the Wizardry series or Ultima series first, like status ailments such as poison and paralysis. It might have introduced that stuff to a much larger Japanese audience, but that stuff had been seen before then in RPGs.

Unfortunately for all of us, Dragon Warrior II is a bad game. It's similar to the first Dragon Warrior game, yes, but it's nowhere near as fun or as easy, either. I can't believe that the game got even remotely good reviews, that is how bad it is to me. How bad? Well, there are some good things in the game, yes, but the bad overshadows them. The only question is, where to do we start with the bad things?

I'm sure this won't become cliched down the
line! Right?

The opening of the game gives a prologue about the events from the first game, saying that Erdrick's descendent came to Alefgard to kick ass and chew bubblegum and how he was all out of gum thanks to the Dragonlord, he rescued the princess of Tantegel, he slew the Dragonlord, married the princess and ran off to whatever the name of the land that Dragon Warrior II takes place in or on or whatever. Several centuries pass and now the line of Erdrick has three possible descendents who each took after one of the original Dragon Warrior protagonist's abilities. The main character of the game took the original descendent's strength, skill with weapons and armor, and fighting abilities, for example. I'll come back to this later, we're still in plot land, remember? Anyway, one day, as you can see from the screenshot that the King of Moonbrooke and his daughter were talking in the garden of the castle, when suddenly, Hargon attacks! The King and his soldiers fight valiantly, but all for naught. The king is easily killed off and the princess... well, the cutscene doesn't show it but she gets transformed into a dog. Yeah, don't bother killing her, Hargon, it's not like it'll come back to bite you in the rear later, right? Anyway, one of the soldiers manages to survive this obvious massacre and goes off to Midenhall, the location of another of Erdrick's descendents, in this case, YOU. He asks for the King of Midenhall (Lorasia in the Japanese version of the game) to stand against Hargon and defeat him, but the King says that he's too old and that this is a task that must fall to younger hands, and so he sends you off with the leather armor on your back, a copper sword, and 50 gold pieces. Thanks, dad! I mean, it's not like I'm going off to fight with a dangerous maniac who could wipe me out with a snap of his fingers, after all! But wait, Dad thought of that, too! He tells you to find your cousins to help you on your quest, meaning the Princess of Moonbrooke (Pudding in the Japanese version) and another in Cannock (whose prince is named Cookie. How very Toriyama-esque). Anyway, the other two have abilities that your character never will, while you have abilities that they never will.

Enemies attack in groups this time!
Be prepared!!

It's probably a good thing, too. You see that screenshot to the right? Well, enemies attack in groups of more than just one this time around. Hargon wants to see blood. At least the underlings of the Dragonlord (whose grandson you can meet in this game) had a sense of honor, right? I mean, I know it's because of gameplay reasons, but still! Anyway, you still have to fight these enemies to gain a lot of levels and gold pieces to move on, just like in Dragon Warrior I. Only this time, you have to do that for as three times as long, because you have three party members, instead of just the one.

You have three party members, each with
their own strengths and weaknesses.

Each party member doesn't just have their own strengths and weaknesses, but just like in Wizardry, Ultima, Might and Magic, and the Bard's Tale, Dungeons & Dragons, you know, all the RPGs that inspired Dragon Quest? Well, just like how they had equipment lists for each character class, so too do the characters of Dragon Warrior II! The Hero is the warrior or the fighter of the group, meaning that he has the largest equipment selection of all three heroes and he has the highest HP total of the group, has well as the most strength and defense. This is made up for by the fact that, unless he uses a magic item, he can't use any magic whatsoever. The Princess of Moonbrooke is the spellcaster of the group, and she has almost no strength or defense on her at all, along with a pitiful HP pool, not to mention the smallest selection of equipment of the group. The Prince of Cannock is the one who is closest to the original Dragon Warrior I hero, in that he is well-rounded, preferring not to focus on any single stat. He has an okay selection of equipment to choose from, and he can cast some spells, but his stats and equipment list aren't anywhere near the levels of the Prince of Midenhall, and his spells don't have quite the 'oomph' of the Princess of Moonbrooke. Also, he tends to die the most of all three characters. Even the Princess of Moonbrooke can last longer than he can! Of course, this is mostly due to only having two real stats. Yes, two stats: Strength, and Agility. Strength determines how much damage you can inflict with weapons. Agility determines how quickly you can take your turn and it also factors into half your defense. He's also the only one to learn the Revive spell, which revives a character with 1 HP. 1. HP. Why doesn't it resurrect you for FULL HP!? What possible justification could there possibly be for just being revived with just 1 HP!?

The locations for the game have new sprites for
entry points, such as larger castles for cities and
castles.

The sprites for this game, or at least for entering locations look better than the original Dragon Warrior game, I'll give this game that. Looking at the screenshot to the right, you can tell that the castle sprite leads to a castle, right?


You know, speaking of overworld traveling, this was the first Dragon Warrior game to have two overworld traveling themes. I honestly think that the first overworld theme you hear is better, as it gives off a feeling of being alone on your journey, that your companions aren't with you, that you're on a hopeless quest and that you'll need help. The second overworld theme is more cheerful sounding, like everything will eventually get better. I mean, in this game, it doesn't, but it doesn't make you want to kill yourself. Speaking of the music, if this game didn't do anything else right, it at least got the music right. The music was composed by Koichi Sugiyama, a literal war-crimes-denier, but the music, or at least most of it, for this game is fantastic. If it didn't do anything else right, it at least got the music right!

The overworld is a lot bigger this time, so we're
gonna need a ship.

Speaking of the overworld, Dragon Warrior II takes the world map of Dragon Warrior I, and kicks it up a notch by making it much larger, introducing new continents and a ship travel system that was, again, in Ultima first, and it makes the exploration feel so much more rewarding than the first Dragon Warrior, because now you have more dungeons to explore, more land to travel through, and a bunch more monsters to fight! Also, speaking of the game's dungeons, this one also introduces dark spots to certain areas in dungeons, meaning that if you want to find the way to continue in the dungeon, you'll either have to consult a map or take a wild guess at which path has your destination in it. This... was not the last time it would be used. Sequels, but we'll get to those later. Unfortunately, it feels like you have to visit every dungeon, cave and tower both, in this game, whether you want to or not, unlike the first game.

Hargon is here to punish you!

Overall, I'm not exactly sure what else I can say about this game. Oh yeah, Dragon Warrior II is easily the most skippable of the Dragon Warrior games on the NES, and I'm certain most of you already have, so good job you! Basically, if you want to play Dragon Warrior II, then go with one of the many ports of the game that have come out. Just like Final Fantasy I, Dragon Warrior I and Dragon Warrior II were ported to numerous systems, usually as a bundle, for the SNES, GBC, Cellphones, iOS and Android devices. If you absolutely must play Dragon Warrior II for whatever reason, then go with one of the ports, avoid the NES original like the plague. Several of the problems found in the NES version were fixed starting with the SNES version, while the iOS/Android version is based on that one with a few new things, such as being able to rename the other playable characters, etc. The level cap for Cannock and Moonbrooke were raised to be on par with Midenhall's, new stats were added, Cannock's equipment list got expanded a bit, the music is better, there are now stat-boosting seeds, the list goes on for what was fixed in the remakes/ports.

As is Malroth!

If you absolutely must play Dragon Warrior II (I know I said this earlier but I can't stress it enough) avoid the NES version of the game, go with one of the ports I mentioned. The NES version is slow paced and will drive you insane. It wasn't even playtested after either the Moon Fragment Tower or the Cave of Malroth, but the point is still the same! The game was only given a six-month deadline, and by that time, they didn't have any time left to playtest the game, so the entire Rhone Plateau was never tested during development. The ports fixed that problem, though.


I rate this game 2/10. Avoid!




This review, including all text and screenshots, are © 2019 Jestan Diams. Please don't repost this review anywhere else on the internet or print it in a gaming magazine, without my express written consent.

Dragon Warrior Review

The forefather to all JRPGs to date! Just looking at the title screen alone brings back all sorts of memories to me, not all of them fond memories, to be sure, but memories nonetheless...

Dragon Warrior being the first JRPG means that every JRPG out there, not just those that would come later, but every other JRPG made to date tries to mimic its success in some way or other. Basically, Dragon Warrior was created because Dragon Warrior (Dragon Quest in Japan and nowadays even outside of Japan, yet I still call them Dragon Warrior because it simply sounds better and cooler) series creator Yuji Horii felt that there weren't enough JRPGs on the system. So, to fix this, he came to the solution of creating his own by basing Dragon Warrior on two different game systems. The battle system for Dragon Warrior comes from the Wizardry franchise, which was made IN AMERICA, NOT JAPAN!! The Japanese LOVE Wizardry, as do I, a fact I can't emphasize enough, and the traveling through an overworld and not just a dungeon comes from the Ultima franchise. Horii, like most other Japanese folk, was hooked on Wizardry, but he apparently liked Ultima more. I'm honestly not sure, I just know that the Japanese loved both, but they loved Wizardry more. What I do know is, is that Horii's concept worked.

Choose a name and a text speed to begin.

Well, the first thing you usually wind up doing in any RPG is entering the name of your character, and Dragon Warrior is no different. After entering your character name and the speed at which messages are displayed, you then get thrust into the throne room of the King of Tantegel Castle, who tells you some of what's going on, or rather what your ancestor, the legendary hero Erdrick did, years ago. What he doesn't tell you is that his daughter has been kidnapped, shock of all shocks. But for once, the antagonist doesn't keep the princess nearby him like, say, Bowser from Super Mario Bros. does, oh no, the Dragonlord, your nemesis in this game, apparently learned from Bowser's mistake and hid this princess away good and proper.

I'm all ears!

The King, for whatever reason, has also locked his throne room's door, meaning that you'll need a key to unlock it. Fair enough, he has one sitting right behind his daughter's throne. Unfortunately, using the Magic Key uses it up and it disappears, but at least the Throne Room isn't locked anymore, meaning that if the Dragonlord wanted to, he could break in again, steal other females from the castle, go out and roast the cows of the village for food, and then go back to Tantegel Castle for seconds. Anyway, the king has told you that you need to prepare for your journey, and in addition to the Magic Key that unlocked his Throne Room door, he also has given you a torch and 120 gold pieces to get you started on the right foot. Now, the manual for the game stated you could either buy the Bamboo Pole and the Leather Armor to start you off proper, or you could buy the Club and the Clothes. What I've learned is the best way to start off, since the translation/localization team apparently couldn't count for jack, is to buy the Bamboo Pole, the Clothes, and the Small Shield. That way you're already decked out for combat.

Fighting with a Wolf!

Speaking of combat, all battles in this game are in First-Person mode. You will not be seeing your character fighting at all, but at least it allows you to strengthen your imagination, right? If your brain can't fill in the blanks with this sort of battle system, then you should read the Harry Potter books to help strengthen your imagination. Anyway, you'll be grinding quite a lot in Dragon Warrior. I mean, like, a real lot. Seriously, in Dragon Warrior, you spend at least 90% of the time grinding, and the other 10% of the time is when you'll actually be trying to make progress through the game's story.



Speaking of the game's story, or rather what little story there actually is, (remember, it's the world's first JRPG, so it didn't really have to try in the story department) isn't that great. Basically, the whole story is this: the Dragonlord broke into Tantegel Castle, stole the Ball of Light and kidnapped Princess Gwaelin, and now it's your job to rescue her. That's it. That's Dragon Warrior's whole plot.

The music of the game, though really relaxing, doesn't fair much better. There's only about seven tracks in the game, and only one of them is remixed, and that is the dungeon music. The lower you go in dungeons, the more ominous sounding the music will become.

Erdrick has left you some encouraging words.

There is one part of the game that I'm glad never returned, and that's the darkness in the game's dungeons. You see, in Dragon Warrior and Dragon Warrior alone, whenever you enter a cave or some other underground dungeon, it is dark and you can only see your hero and the tile he's on. That's it. You have to either use a torch, or cast the Radiant spell in order to light the place up enough to see where you're going, but Torches use up valuable inventory space and the Radiant spell uses up too much MP, and for this game's final boss fight, you have to have the MP to survive what is basically a battle of endurance.

Could this have been a trap!?

Overall, just like with the NES version of Final Fantasy I, I can't in good conscience recommend playing Dragon Warrior's NES version, unless you have patience and/or an affinity for these older
games. Thankfully, it was also ported to several systems, just like Final Fantasy 1. These include the SNES, GBC, Cellphones, iOS devices and Android devices. Get one of those instead, and only get the NES version as a collector's item.



This review, including all text and screenshots, are © 2019 Jestan Diams. All rights reserved. Please don't repost this anywhere on the internet or print it in a magazine article without my express written consent.